'Next PM' brings national show to M'bah
NORTHERN Rivers comedian Mark Swivel will next week bring his latest tour - or political campaign, rather - to the humble halls of Murwillumbah.
And on his way to the Melbourne International Comedy Festival, Swivel will be using the Tweed show, which he said would be like a "slightly-drunk Ted Talk", as a fundraising opportunity for local homeless support charity You Have a Friend.
Swivel said his latest show, Alternative Prime Minister, offered a breath of fresh air when it came to Australia's political realm.
"People are so p---ed off with politicians that they kind of need an opportunity for group therapy," Swivel said.
He said the show would involve a masterclass in being the most successful politician possible, a must in what has been in recent years a volatile parliamentary climate.
This covers everything from mastering the art of the Aussie sausage sizzle to kissing babies.
"No question, we don't see enough baby kissings," he said.
Swivel said he'd also discuss the vital importance of a nation's leader being well acquainted with the high-vis jacket, whether it's to protect themselves during a baby-kissing ceremony, the opening of a new library or at the ground-breaking for a site that won't see construction for another 12 months.
But the question of why on Earth anyone would want to be Prime Minister will be raised at length, he said.
"Turnbull was made for the job... and he's still managed to stuff it up completely," he said.
"So what chance has anybody else got?"
But he also discusses why he would be "obviously unfit" and therefore the perfect for public office.
"It involves Venn diagrams and hula hoops... that's when I bring in the ten-point plan," he said.
Among the big changes he would include a flag tax, and a new ministerial portfolio covering cricket.
"If you put a flag out the front of your house, you'll have to pay a tax and it should be a large sum of money," Swivel said.
All new citizens - under the new Minister's guidance - will wind up with a floppy hat and a new cricket bat.
"That'll really boost the economy," Swivel said.
Swivel said he was thrilled to be able to support You have a Friend in next week's show, which will mark his first performance in Murwillumbah.
He said the fundraiser would particularly support those displaced since the March floods last year.
"I thought it was a good charity to support," he said.
He said despite difficulties finding the right spaces for shows in regional towns, the Queen St Citadel had piqued his interest.
"It's actually difficult to find venues to do these sorts of shows," he said.
"I go from really big venues to none at all but it's a nice venue for arts and music."
Along with his Murwillumbah gig, Swivel will soon head to Brisbane, Lismore, Mullumbimby, Hervey Bay, Sydney, Canberra, Bellingen, Newcastle and Melbourne International Comedy Festival.
"This is the third year I've done the Melbourne International Comedy Festival," Swivel said.
"I can't wait. (The show) should really connect with the beard oil wholesalers of Fitzroy and the child labourers they use to lace the Sherrins down there."
In Melbourne, he will also take part in a group show, Rhubarb at the Melba.
But as his Murwillumbah gig approaches, Swivel said he loved performing on the Northern Rivers.
"Audiences are sympatico and great for trying out new ideas," he said.
"Some regional gigs I do just to catch up with old friends like in Newcastle or Albury.
"I once did a show in Gympie where a mate was living in a former nudist colony. The property had unusually high fences!"
He said getting onto the Sydney Comedy Festival for the first time as a "near dead white male", at 51, was "nice".
Swivel will bring his show to The Citadel, 21 Queen St Murwillumbah, from 7.30pm on Friday, February 9. For tickets visit www.swiv.com.au/book-now.