Lifestyle

Secrets shared in lasting love

Lance and Judith Doughty, of Maroochydore, believe you’re never too old to enjoy flowers.
Lance and Judith Doughty, of Maroochydore, believe you’re never too old to enjoy flowers. Greg Miller

WE SEE it on TV and hear it on the radio: the celebrity matches made in heaven that more often than not come crashing back down to earth.

But what is it about relationships now that just doesn't seem to work?

So many young people tie the knot only to hit the splits.

Not too long ago, this kind of see-sawing decision to divorce or separate was very rare.

Some of our more senior citizens may just hold the key to unlocking the secret formula to a successful marriage and relationship longevity.

And you don't have to look too far to see that many of our own Sunshine Coast residents are living proof that a lasting relationship may indeed be easier to maintain than you think.

Jim and Joy Kikos, of Cotton Tree, married in their early twenties and have lived together happily for the past 53 years.

They believe relationships in the modern era aren't going the distance due to the approach that young people have on their relationships - in particular, the instant need for gratification.

"I don't think people are willing to work for a relationship anymore," Joy said.

"People these days want something and are not prepared to wait.

"There's no compromise.

"Young people want something and they want it now. So when it doesn't work, they just say forget it (the relationship)."

Joy's husband Jim said that a big difference between the youth of today and his generation was their work ethic and in particular how hard people had to work to earn a dollar.

"I came out here from Greece and I was prepared to work," Jim said.

"It's the same thing with my wife. I worked for her as well."

A change of attitude towards life and relationships seems to be a resonating theme for older couples who believe that financial reasons have a lot to do with the downfall of the modern relationship.

Lance and Judith Doughty, of Maroochydore, celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary over the weekend and they both believe that when it comes to relationships, they just don't make them like they used to.

"Money has a lot to do with it," Lance said.

Judith added: "We don't owe anybody anything. We didn't have the plastic cards like you do today - we had to save."

The couple said they also believed that no relationship was perfect and that no matter what your age, couples could make their relationship work if they kept things simple.

"It's important to talk your problem through instead of saying, 'That's it. I'm finished' and walk out," Judith said.

"We have many an argument.

"Sometimes we scream and rant and rave with each other, but we get over it.

"It's not worth leaving home for.

"The love is still there."

The couple has called Maroochydore home for 26 years and their advice for the younger generations considering marriage couldn't be simpler.

"Develop trust and be tolerant with each other," Judith said.

Lance went further: "Never go to bed with an argument on your mind because you wake up and it's still there.

"It's all about give and take."

 

>> Read more lifestyle stories.

Topics:  lifestyle love relationships romance



Surfers farewell Joe the Loveable Larrikin

Joe Larkin sponsored Andy Mac in 1970 with $25 a week to surf and a free supply of boards like this one shaped by Brian "Furry "Austin.

Remembering surfing's pioneering days after Joe Larkin's passing

90-year-old gym junkie's not ready to quit

REACHING HIS GOALS: Personal trainer Rusty Roberts puts 90-year-old Rod Stebbins through a workout.

Rod Stebbins won't let age slow him down.

Tweed's gig guide for this weekend

GIGS: Fat Albert will be playing at the Twin Towns Services Club today and tomorrow.

Check out what's on this weekend.

Local Partners

REVIEW: Bigger 10.5 inch iPad Pro packs power, fun

AFTER a long day at the office staring at a computer screen, sometimes the last thing you want to do is look at another device.

Elon Musk using anti-phone device at Splendour?

FILE - In this April 30, 2015, file photo, Tesla Motors CEO Elon Musk unveils the company's newest products, in Hawthorne, Calif. Tesla Motors is starting to build its electric cars with all the sensors, cameras and other gear needed to drive completely on their own when regulations allow the technology to take over that responsibility. The announcement made late Wednesday, Oct. 19, 2016, by Tesla CEO Musk marks the Silicon Valley automaker's next step toward selling cars that can navigate the roads without the help of a human. (AP Photo/Ringo H.W. Chiu, File)

Did Musk use high-tech to protect his privacy at the festival?

Cartoonist Mitch Cairns wins Archibald Prize

A portrait of Agatha Gothe-Snape has won the 2017 Archibald Prize for cartoonist Mitch Cairns.

Portrait of partner capture renowned art accolade.

Princess Diana: How an Aussie's story made her cry

‘A tear rolled down her cheek’ ... Phil Williams tells his story to Princess Diana.

Phil Williams met Princess Diana on his 18th birthday.

Jonathan LaPaglia takes you inside Australian Survivor s2

Jonathan LaPaglia in a scene from season two of Australian Survivor.

Strategy plays key role as castaways seek to make savvy moves.

Bachelor Recap: Matty’s stunning public rejection

Chic.

Last night we saw humiliation at its best

NZ anchor drops F-bomb live on air

Veteran news anchor Eric Young has been caught uttering an expletive.

Veteran NZ newsreader swears on live television

Hearty food for cold nights

Boneless lamb shoulder roast with crushed kipflers.

RECIPES: Two tasty lamb dishes to try this winter

How one man made more than $20m in a land deal

Varsity Lakes

Sale, with GST added, shows as a $26.4 million transaction

Oasis in Oxley Cove estate

14 Midship Court, Banora Point

Check out this week's feature property.

Tenant: Let me rent, I'll fix your property and pay for it

Noosaville tenant Tony Conyers thought his tenancy was guaranteed until 2035, so he spent his own money on the property. Now he's been told he may not be able to stay for even one more year.

Renter spent $30k on maintaining, improving property over 17 years