Lifestyle

Weighty problem can cool things down in the bedroom

Q My wife is the sexiest, most beautiful woman in the world to me.

Yes she has gained quite a bit of weight over the last few years and she keeps complaining that she no longer fits into her pretty dresses, but I honestly don't see anything but my wife's beauty, inside and out.

I am proud to be with her, and I desire her every day, still after over 15 years of marriage and three kids.

We still have an active sex life but she has admitted to me that she often has sex without being in the mood for it, just to make me happy.

Since she's told me that, I can't get it out of my mind and I no longer enjoy making love to her like I used to because I want us both to enjoy it and don't like the thought of her doing it just for me.

It's meant to be something we both share and love.

How can I get my wife to want to have sex with me again? I've tried everything - even buying her sexy red lingerie!

A Here's a tip: have you tried buying her black lingerie?

Or better yet, a gift certificate for her to choose her own special something that she is comfortable wearing and feels sexy and pretty in herself?

A little known fact from research is that red is the number one colour choice men prefer to see their female partner in, but black is the colour women choose to wear themselves when it comes to feeling sexiest.

A more well known fact is that poor body image can destroy libido.

If a woman doesn't feel sexy, it's hard for her to get in the mood for sex.

If she feels self-conscious about her body, she will listen to the negative self talk about how unattractive she tells herself she is (in her own mind, or out loud).

If she feels self-conscious in bed, she won't enjoy herself and will feel distracted and unhappy.

It's very hard for a woman to feel much emotional or sexual pleasure if she's focused on trying to cover cellulite or groaning inwardly when a belly roll is prominently on display.

That your wife continues to make love with you when she doesn't really want to shows her love for you and her commitment to the relationship.

So rather than feel badly, focus your attention on improving your wife's libido and supporting her in that quest, if she wants it.

If so, talk together about what kinds of things might make her feel sexier and more in the mood.

Is it more date time with you that is romantic but not sexual?

Is it alone pampering time?

Is it exercise and dieting to improve her energy levels and help her reconnect with her physical body to feel better about herself?

Is it hearing more positive praise from you about how beautiful you think she is?

 

>> To read more lifestyle stories

Topics:  dating lifestyle love sex weight women



Brisbane's arts and culture events centre stage

A CITY drenched in culture, Brisbane is again flaunting an arts and culture events calendar fit for a queen.

Homewares stores to fulfil your Instagram dreams

No Caption

You too can become an Insta-star with these fab stores.

Date nights under $50

Nothing is more romantic than a picnic with a cracking view.

NOT every date has to cost you a bomb.

Top 10 Brisbane experiences to cross off your bucket list

Do yourself a favour and get amongst the food truck scene. Eat Street is a great place to start.

A GOOD bucket list doesn’t have to span continents or cost millions.

Six mega sporting events you need to be at this year

Don't miss all the action trackside this season.

IF THERE is one thing Brisbane does damn well, it’s play host.

Six reasons to get to Brisbane this Autumn

The Brisbane Powerhouse has free comedy on Friday nights.

AUTUMN has to be up there with one of the best seasons of the year.

The best things to do in Brisbane are FREE. Yes, FREE

Mt Coot-tha is a seriously gorgeous way to start your day.

HEADING to the big smoke doesn’t have to come with a big price tag.

Council accused of playing up with party politics

Councillors Chirs Cherry, Warren Polglase and Reece Byrnes during the campaign election.

Labor Councillor wants answers about police numbers.

Tweed Shire Council news at a glance

Tweed Shire Councillors discuss the council's agenda.

Find out what was discussed at last week's council meeting.

Local Partners

Hervey Bays to star in international horror flick

A great white thriller that had scenes filmed on the Fraser Coast has been picked up by a major US movie studio.

Cher, 71, and Celine Dion wow world at Billboard Awards

“I’m 71 yesterday and I can do a five-minute plank, OK.”

Judah's return to The Voice stage is a knockout

Judah Kelly performs during his knockout round on The Voice.

QUEENSLAND singer nails Adele hit.

WIN acquires rights to Southern Cross Media television

WIN network coverage

Changes to take effect at end of the month

Wentworth star Daniielle Alexis: "I was born a boy"

Wentworth star Daniielle Alexis has revealed she was born a boy

Dwayne Johnson, Tom Hanks announce White House bid on SNL

Dwayne Johnson is “officially” running for president in 2020

What to expect at Birds of Tokyo's Ipswich gig

The band will perform at the Racehorse Hotel on Friday.

BAND member Glen Sarangapany talks music, pub grub and doing shoeys

The face of the Sunshine Coast's overpriced rental crisis

Alyx Wilson had to rent a $385 unit in Currimundi because the market was too competitive for cheaper rental housing. She is now renting a room from friends who own a house in Currimundi, and says its much more affordable.

Young people feel the strain in competitive, expensive rental market

WATCH: Take a tour of a tradie's dream home

5a Bruce Hiskens Court, Norman Gardens, going for $720,000. INSET: Lea Taylor.

Huge block with potential for anything

REVEALED: Where it's cheaper to pay off a mortgage than rent

6/190 Ewing Rd, Woodridge, is listed for offers $215,000. Picture: realestate.com.au

Brisbane suburbs where it is cheaper to buy than rent

The hardest place in the state to find a rental property

RENTAL SHORTAGE: Richmond River, Ballina Bar Emigrant Creek Pacific Highway Teven Interchange. Photo Jay Cronan / The Northern Star

Not enough supply to meet insatiable demand

Buy a business for less than $400,000

Springfield Lakes Night Owl is now for sale.

Springfield Lakes convenience store for sale

Ready to SELL your property?

Post Your Ad Here!