Australia`s Quade Cooper is yellow carded and leave the pitch whilst playing New Zealand in the International Rugby Test Match at Eden Park in Auckland, New Zealand on Friday, April 10, 2015.
Australia`s Quade Cooper is yellow carded and leave the pitch whilst playing New Zealand in the International Rugby Test Match at Eden Park in Auckland, New Zealand on Friday, April 10, 2015. AAP Image - David Rowland

Why each team won't win the Rugby World Cup

IN A week of predictions and cultural stereotyping, the Herald has done its best to try to fit in with the crowd and identify the 'real' reason why each team won't win the Rugby World Cup.

Pool A
England
Ali Williams has rattled them.

Australia
Sorry, Australia actually will win it*.

Wales
Injury prone.

Fiji
If it was the all-Nadolo team they'd have a chance.

Uruguay
They would need to win at least six games, four more than their current World Cup wins total - so not going to happen.

* Just joking, Quade Cooper will obviously find a way to stuff things up

Pool B
South Africa
They win it every third World Cup so pencil them in for next time.

Samoa
Smiling assassins have never advanced past the quarter-finals, which is crucial in winning a World Cup.

Scotland
Not enough New Zealanders in their team.

Japan
Timing their run for 2019.

United States
Two words - Donald Trump.

Pool C
New Zealand
It's clear in 2015 - winning World Cups is not New Zealand's thing (see Black Caps, Silver Ferns).

Argentina
Unfortunately scrums don't get you points.

Tonga
A team wearing red has never won a World Cup.

Georgia
Recent wins over Spain, Germany and Portugal should make them favourites...if it was the FIFA World Cup.

Namibia
We can see them causing six major upsets but seven is just one bridge too far.

Pool D
France
Semifinal specialists.

Ireland
Will let a major win slip out of their hands, just like they did in 1991 World Cup semi-final, and against the All Blacks two years ago.

Italy
Still heavily reliant on a carbohydrate based diet. Need to get with the times.

Canada
As esteemed Canadian poet Chad Kroeger might say "This is how you remind me.. that we aren't good at rugby."

Romania
They've won the big one before - as in one pool game in 1987, 1991, 1999, and 2007.



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